Atlantis Resort – Slowly Sinking Back Beneath The Caribbean
Written: Mar 24 '04
|
Product Rating:
|
|
|
Pros: Sun, sea, sand slides and sex.
Cons: Expensive , poor upscale restaurants, small spa and obnoxious timeshare reps
The Bottom Line: Overpriced and overhyped. Waterslides and aquatics were great. Lousy spa and upscale restaurants. Average rating for the price.
|
|
|
| jcare's Full Review: Atlantis, Paradise Island Resort |
My family spent a five-day five-person vacation at Atlantis Resort Paradise Island in March 2004. We’d heard great things about the resort from many of our friends and read some really excellent reviews online. So maybe I went with my expectations set too high for the week, but I ended up disappointed with my stay. Overall the family vote was two positive, two neutral and one negative.
Making Reservations
There are numerous sites which claim to give you a great deal on rooms at Atlantis, but when push came to shove, they all ended up at the same price, so we booked directly through the resort 800 number (actually 888-528-7155). This was probably a big mistake as the reservations agents took every opportunity to upsell you and repeatedly refused to explain what the various packages would include. I found this very frustrating and was at one point about 10 seconds away from canceling the entire vacation. On another occasion when my wife called to clarify a line item on the booking statement they attempted to charge her another $300 because of a “booking error”. We probably spent at least 8-10 hours sorting out our reservations after they had actually been booked – not a pleasant experience.
First Impressions
We flew directly into Nassau, beautiful sunshine, tropical breeze and a bus to meet us and whisk us away to the resort. There are good parts and bad parts of the island, and the ride to Paradise Island definitely shows you all the aspects. After about 25-30 minutes you traverse the bridge across to Paradise Island and get your first view of the spires of Atlantis – actually quite impressive. The bus stops at the Royal Tower and the Coral Tower, where you are met by a host of bell-hops and a welcoming committee.
Most rooms are not ready until 4pm, so if you arrive early you can check in, and be given keys (more on that later), but cannot get to your room until notified. After you’ve checked in, beware anyone with an orange jacket – their sole purpose in life is to attract you across the way to the new timeshares Atlantis is building. Depending upon how you negotiate you can get anywhere from $75 to $150 to visit the timeshare during your stay, but we decided our time was too valuable. The orange jackets are like bees; they constantly hover around and bother you, eventually becoming very annoying.
Assuming you avoid the orange jackets, you can check your bags and make your way to a courtesy cave outside the Beach Tower, change into your swimsuit and hang by the pool and use all the resort facilities until your room is ready. So
Hint #1: Make sure you pack a small bag with your pool stuff, suntan lotion, book and whatever your kids may need if you arrive before 4pm.
The Room
There are three main towers in Atlantis. The premium tower is the Royal Tower, which features some hunky suites, the famous bridge room (a room which occupies the bridge between the two Royal towers). Next is the Coral Tower, and the supposedly lower-end rooms are in the Beach Tower. We booked two rooms in Beach, one with an ocean view, and one with an inland view. The ocean view room had a small balcony, about 3 feet deep, with a wrought iron railing.
Our room was about the size of a regular hotel room, featuring a king size bed, a table with two chairs, a decent size TV, in-room mini-bar and a couple of bedside cabinets. There was only one phone in the room, by the bed, with a dataport for a laptop computer. The bathroom was nothing special, with a toilet, sink – with a large surface area around it for stuff, and a regular sized bath/shower. Amenities included shampoo, conditioner, lotion and shower gel plus a hair dryer.
Hint #2: The hotel does actually have a wireless broadband network that you can tap into if you know how.
Room maintenance was just OK – twice we noticed the sheets were dirty, on another occasion we had almost no towels and then the next day the shampoo, conditioner and so on had totally vanished. Any time we called the “Guest Services” hotline the problem was resolved in typical Bahamian time – about an hour.
The Spa
The Spa was undoubtedly, along with a few of the restaurants, the biggest disappointment of entire trip. It was overcrowded, understaffed and actually very small. Although the massage I received was adequate, I arrived at the Spa 25 minutes early but only got my locker room key 90 seconds before my massage was due to start. Everyone was complaining about being rushed. Plus the actual rooms were miniscule; the masseuse had to move equipment around every time she needed to walk from one side of the table to the other. It then took nearly 48 hours for the spa manager to respond to my complaint – although it was satisfactorily resolved.
Facilities
There is no question that there is a lot to keep you busy during the day – as long as you like the water. There are multiple pools, ranging from baby and kiddie pools to full-sized adult pools. Many of these are “zero-entry”, which means you can gradually walk-in as opposed to having to go down steps or jump-in. I was surprised by how cold the pools were – definitely cooler than the ocean.
Probably the most famous facilities at Atlantis are the rides around the Mayan Temple. Note that you have to be at least 48” to use most of the exciting ones, they’re open from 9am to 6pm and children under 16 are supposedly accompanied at all times. In fact the slides open earlier than 9am, they don’t care as long as you’re over 48” and a teenager.
First there is “The Leap of Faith”, which pretty much drops you 60 feet vertically down a slide, exiting through a plastic tube running through a shark-filled lagoon. Not for those with loose-fitting bikini tops. Secondly are the Challenger Slides, featuring two parallel slides so you can race your friends and check out the timer to see who won. Note that many adults complained this ride hurt their upper butt muscles and left them feeling very sore after a few races. Probably the most entertaining slide is the Serpent Ride, in which you sit in a tube and whirl around the inside of the Temple before exiting into a large Perspex boxtube leading through the lagoon. On my first ride down I was accompanied along the tube by a smallish shark who was obviously thinking “breakfast!!” Fun. Also at the Mayan Temple is the Jungle Slide, which is just a classic twist and turn water driven slide into the main pool. On the Beach Towers side is the Lazy River Slide, in which you just plop into a tube and let the current gently drift you around the entire 10-15 minute circuit. Very relaxing and fun for the whole family.
You have access to several beaches from Atlantis too – which feature local native vendors offering t-shirts, hair braiding and necklaces. There are also jet ski, banana boat and parasailing outfits (“$1 to go up, $44 to bring you back down, mon”) which are not affiliated with the resort.
It’s also worth mentioning that there is a decent lap pool by the Gym, tennis courts and a 18 hole putting course. The course is actually rather difficult and I wouldn’t recommend it for anyone under 12. The Gym is a good size and has a sizable collection of treadmills, Stairmasters and exercise equipment. Be warned that its an additional $15 a day to use the exercise room.
Restaurants
The Atlantis features a multitude of restaurants, which I will feature in a separate review. One was awesome, some were good, and several of the “upscale” spots were downright poor. Meals are expensive, so if you have any type of appetite at all I’d recommend that you purchase one of the Meal Plans. Also pack a bunch of snacks (Nutrigrain bars and so on) for your stay.
Casino & Other Indoor Stuff
The Casino was pretty much like any other casino, with a full complement of tables and slots liberally interspersed with bars. One thing I did find strange was that the minimum bet at Blackjack was a pricy $25 and offered 3-2 payout on a BlackJack. A few small tables during the early evening had a $15 minimum but only offered 6-5 payouts on a BJ. Very strange. Given that the rule of thumb for BJ is that your initial stake should be for at least 40 hands that equates to $1,000 for an evening. An expensive proposition if lady luck is against you.
There is also a Comedy Club on the premises, which we didn’t visit but according to buzz around the pool was very funny – although it offers the same act every night (closed Mondays) so you’ll only get one night’s entertainment out of it.
Teens have their own Club Rushfor those aged 13-17 ; and parents need to show the kids id to get them registered. The club runs 8.30 to midnight seven days a week. Admission is $18. A session from 5pm to 8pm is held for pre-teen ages 7 to 12. In addition to music the club features video game machines, internet access and DVD/videos on a big screen.
The Fish
In addition to the aforementioned sharks there are a multitude of other aquatic creatures in and around the lagoons. We saw manta rays, lobster, more tropical fish than you could shake a stick at, grouper, eels and some huge starfish. There are daily feeding sessions for most of the marine habitats and it’s a great way to get children to behave by threatening them to be shark bait for the following day (just kidding before I get a storm of behavioral psychologist moms complaining..).
Several of the restaurants have plate glass fronts giving spectacular views of the central lagoons, plus the Atlantis Dig has a set of tunnels which give you an alternative view of the sea creatures. Even my blasé teenagers stopped and stared at the close-up views of the lagoon creatures.
Final Thoughts
I realized that the gentle breeze I heard everywhere I went was in fact the sound of twenty dollar bills being sucked out of my wallet. Although I personally had an OK time at the resort I felt it was over-hyped and under-delivered. I was particularly aggrieved to find out that you can stay at a neighboring hotel for a fraction of the cost and cut a deal to get the Atlantis wristbands to gain access to all the facilities – what a rip-off!!
So, yes – it was an experience and I did find it relaxing. But – I didn’t get my value for money and probably would never go back there unless someone else was picking up most of the bill.
Recommended:
Yes
|
|
|
|
Epinions.com ID:
jcare
|
 - Top 500 |
|
Location: Southeast Pennsylvania
Reviews written: 269
Trusted by: 219 members
About Me:
Bullets can hurt people. Both in guns and PowerPoint.
|
|
|
- Add to My Yahoo!: 
- Add to Google Homepage: 
© 1999-2009 Shopping.com, Inc.