This Grandbaby Was A Gift From God
Apr 21 '01
The Bottom Line If it is your relative that has decided to give up her baby, she probably know best. Make sure you support her.
Yesterday my 11 Grandbaby was born to my oldest daughter(30)I did not get to see him I only know he has red hair and was very long he weighed 7lb 8oz.
Why wasn't I able to see this child, I could have went down and looked and held him before his adoptive parents took him home today.
My daughter had three children and was engaged to be married. The only problem was he did not treat her children the same as he treated his. She put him out of her house and her life.
Then 4 weeks later she found out she was pregnant again. She was very upset, she could not take care of another baby. She can barely take care of the ones she has. She has never gotten child support for the three she has, their daddy is always on the run or in jail. The department of welfare just doesn't look very hard. She was making mininum wage working at a store.
she thought about abortion for a long while which I don't particulary care for and in all honesty neither did she. She said she would not be able to live with herself if she had an abortion.
When she was about 2 months along in her pregnancy, she came to the house and told me she was planning to give the baby up for adoption. My mouth fell open, but when we sat down and discussed it I knew and so did she that this was the only solution.
She got in touch with the adoption agency that came to our home and talked to she and I about it. We were able to pick out the family that would be taking the baby.
The adoption agency brought a book of prospective families. Each family had pictures of their homes and their extended families, their pets etc. The kind of income they had and the kind of work they did. Extensive background reports on each one done by a social worker.
From this information, she picked out a couple that was as alike in their family as we are in ours. By that I mean they had a big extended family, brothers, sisters, moms, dads, and grandparents, nieces and nephews.
The next step was meeting the prospective parents, this was arranged by the social worker. My daughter and her sister went to meet them and they sat down and talked. She decided that this was the couple that she wanted to have the baby.
Needless to say the couple was thrilled. The arrangements were made.
My daughter asked me to tell her children as she said she did not know how to do this in a way that they could understand. I gathered the three children at my house. The oldest boy is 13, his brother 7, and their sister is 6. They all new that mommy was going to have another baby.
I told them that the baby would not be coming home after mom had him. He would be going to live with two nice people that could not have a baby. He would live in a big house and have plenty of clothes and toys and pets, and lots of love.
The oldest wanted to know why his mom wasn't keeping the baby? I tried to explain that he had a hard life. They live at proverty level. Never enough money or allowances to go around. They always have to worry about clothes and shoes. He did understand this and only asked that he be with his mother when the baby was born and to be able to see the baby. This wish was granted. The other two just wanted to know if the baby would have a dog and cat to play with and they were told yes.
The pregnancy progressed and my daughter was in a lot of pain all the time especially closer to the time for the baby to come. She stayed in touch with the couple and was going to allow the adoptive mother to be in the room with her.
Thursday night her water broke and she called the couple and me to tell us she was going to the hospital. I could not go and be with her due to medical reasons. My niece that lives with her and both her sisters went and her son.
I will call the adoptive mother AMMM. Ammm knew nothing about having a baby with each contraction she would tell my daughter here comes another one. It was a long labor and my niece, Ammm, my other two daughters and my grandson were all in the room with her. As she started to push Ammm held one leg and my niece held her other leg so that she could push.
Out in the hall waited Jmmm, Ammm husband, one of my daughters went out to wait outside the door with him as he was very shakey.
When the baby crowned the crying started. Ammm and the others in the room, birth is such a glorious moment. My daughter outside almost had to catch Jmmm when he heard the baby and his wife crying all at the same time.
While the doctors finished with my daughter. The new parents went with the baby at my daughters request. She decided not to see the baby although her son and my other daughters saw him and congratulated the new parents.
Today she signed the papers and talked to them both. They kept telling her how her sacrifice was God's gift to them. She felt good about her decision and knows that the little boy will be taken good care of for the rest of his life if it is God's will.
The adoptive parents have an adoptive baby book with the names of his brothers and sister and will tell him when he is old enough to know that his mother gave them a great gift. Him.
The emotional turmoil has not set in with my daughter yet. This decision was the right one for her. When she grieves for this baby as I am sure she will, she will know in her heart that she did the right thing for him and her.
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disartain
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Member: Diane Sartain
Location: Somewhere in SC
Reviews written: 374
Trusted by: 549 members
About Me:
Every day my children play is a good day. :)
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