Not even Half-As good as Half-Life!! HAHAHA!! I ARR FUNNAY!!
Written: May 01 '01
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Graphics, Cool Intro
Cons: Easy puzzles, bad animation, and way, way too short
The Bottom Line: Anuddah Half-Life it ain't. Hell, it's not even another Opposing Force.
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| murphofpluh's Full Review: Gunman Chronicles for Windows |
I remember the day I first played Half-Life. It was Christmas Eve 1999 and I bought the game earlier that week for my brothers... yeah. I think to this day my brothers have played it a total of 3 times, but this is irrelevant. I loved the game, blowing up stuff was taken to a new level of goodness. I could interact with my environments, shoot some really badass aliens, and fight some purdy smart army dudes. The game was long, witch was good, and all in all I was fulfilled. Soon after came the release of Opposing Force, witch I also purchased and enjoyed. A bit shorter than the original, but you can only expect such from an expansion. I was again fulfilled and happy.
Then, one year later while looking around Best Buy and yelling "ACTION MAYUHN!" when seeing the games on the shelves I came across another game off the Half-Life engine: Gunman Chronicles. I looked in it an on the back and saw bigger aliens, dinosauruses, tanks, and western fighter dudes. I noted this game, and made sure that it would be purchased on my behave for Christmas. Sure enough Grandma came through with some boxers, Mentos, a pen for some reason, and Gunman Chronicles.
When I got home I got set up, popped in the game, threw on some Snot, and got ready for some old fashioned shoot-em-up fun. It was installed, I set up my controls, and I was ready. The loading screen came through and in small lettering said "Gunman: Chronicles". The game faded in, and much like the original Half-Life, you start in a little transport thingy with some lady talking about her period or something. I started to walk and look around, nothing happened. I was confoosed, I tried again... nothing. I flailed the mouse and pushed the buttons wildly... nothing. I sat back and stared at the screen, suddenly, my guy was doing all the stuff I told him to about 30 seconds ago, the controls were very delayed. I exited the game, did the little console thingy, and put in the magic gl_d3dflip 1. It worked and I was happy. My computer doesn't suck THAT much balls.
I played for about an hour, if that. I got off the first planet, and did a lot on the second, things seemed to be flying by. The difficulty climbing very slowly, if much at all. It was late so I decided to sleep, no school or work the next day, so I'd have some time to play. Hehehe, that rhymed. Um yeah, anyway...where was I? Oh yes. You see; when a pizza says to bake for 10 minutes at 300 degrees, it doesn't also mean 5 minutes at 600 degrees. And no, giraffes do not eat pizza, no matter what Sears says... wait, no... DAMN!
So anyway, I played for maybe two hours the next day and beat the game. I was like "WHATCHABUTCHA?!?!" I didn't even get to blow anything up good! On top of that, it was easier than that blue haired girl I met at that Soulfly show... I mean, it wasn't hard at all! Do these people actually think that it would take longer than a few hours to beat this thing? The puzzles were repetitive, you get to fight ONE boss, AND DON'T EVEN KILL IT! (it runs away, then someone else blows him up, lucky bastards)
The environment interaction that I loved from Half-Life was cut to a bare minimum, the only thing you really do interact with is some black lady-voiced machine... then again everything she does has nothing to do with you. There are no cool police guys that follow you, all the scientist are just like "You suck! I hope you die! Please don't kill me..." The DEMO of Half-Life was better than this game, that's how easy and pointless it is. I honestly have spent more time playing Kung Fu for Nintendo.
One thing that was really cool though was the introduck-ton. I don't know why, but it felt like something out of one of the old Star Wars Movies. Decent voice acting and just good action throughout, it's too bad there aren't anymore, even though that's not in the good 'ol Half-Life style. Other than that the textures are good, and the characters look decent. Character animation could have been a lot more detailed, especially when you blow up one a dem gyrocopter thingies.
All in all the game was a very good idea, that was either rushed or the people who made it just didn't care. If you haven't played Half-Life or Opposing Force, give Gunman a chance. Maybe I'm just too spoiled from the greatness that is Half-Life, or maybe I'm just thirsty... who knows.
Recommended:
No
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Epinions.com ID: murphofpluh
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Location: Mokena, IL
Reviews written: 15
Trusted by: 0 members
About Me: I am me, who are you?
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