Is **BREAST** Always Best?
Nov 12 '00
Okay, I tricked you. This is a discussion of breast feeding, not a talk about breasts in general. The title was only meant to titillate you.
As the mother of two grown children--one of whom is actually an advisor at epinions, though if I gave his name away he would probably kill me--I feel that I am in a unique position to evaluate all the long term plus and minuses of nursing.
I had always planned on nursing my first child. To me it seemed natural and normal--part of God's (or Nature's) plan for life. When I informed my mother-in-law, she was horrified. The best children, I was told, are bottlefed children. Well, look at my nephew. My sister nursed him and he turned out fine. Not good enough, was her answer.
After three days of labor and emergency C-section with a spinal, along came my 8 pound 10 ounce hungry child. Mom was too tired and too sore to know what she was doing. Latching on was horrible, and taking him off to switch sides was worse. No one explained about putting a finger in his mouth to gently break the suction. I simply pulled the little sucker off and basically gave myself hickies all over my nipples. This was pain. When it was time to go home, I had an infant who had lost almost a pound in a week.
Determined to continue, I approached this scientifically. I decided to nurse every 2 hours. I kept a notebook listing the time I nursed and which side I had started on. When the clocks changed as they always do--spring forward, fall back--it threw off my timekeeping attempts. Never fear, I would persevere. Sore nipples, engorged breasts, incision pain, and then a high fever for me when my son was a month old did not deter my efforts. I would nurse or perish in the process.
At his first one-month check up, he had regained the weight he had lost. When I discussed his sleeping habits with my pediatrician, I realized the little critter was actually sleeping through the night--he fell asleep at 11 PM and slept until 5 or 6 AM. I was too tired and too sore to realize. When the doctor said he couldn't guarantee that he would continue to sleep through the night if I switched to a bottle, my husband and daddy of little child thought I should certainly keep on nursing. It was easy for him--he handed me one diapered but crying child, I took said infant into bed, nursed while lying down, and daddy then removed sleeping infant 15 minutes later. (If I had to nurse, he had to diaper the child at night--it only seemed fair. I attributed this to necessary bonding time for daddy. It was actually sleeping time for mom. Don't tell.) I even went back to work part time when he was 6 months old. I made up bottles of breast milk which I froze to give to the baby sitter. He hated it from a bottle and wouldn't drank it so I ended up buying individual bottles of formula. After 6 months, I quit the job and resumed nursing for all feedings.
I continued to nurse for 15 months. He thrived and grew healthy and happy. However, he did have more than his share of ear infections and strept throat resulting in hospitalizations for ear tubes, adenoids and tonsils. He also had a variety of respiratory allergies which he still suffers from today. (You can see his review of allergy stuff--but I can't disclose his identity.) He has a high IQ, skipped a year of school, read before age four, and is reasonably well adjusted with no unusual breast fetishes as far as I can tell.
His brother came along 28 months later. I also nursed him for over a year. He was constantly spitting up which was attributed to my overfeeding my child. He left the hospital at his birth weight and continued to pack it on his first 6 months. He was never fat--just well rounded. He is also a college student and has a high IQ. He read before age 4 as well.
However, my second son suffered from severe food allergies from age 2 until age 13 years. He actually went into anaphylactic shock after eating a macadamia nut. His diet became so restricted that he was unable to have beef, any form of milk, pork, fish, soy, eggs, apples, green beans, or mustard. You would think that over a year of nursing would have affected his food allergies according to all the hype over nursing. All I know is that while I nursed, I drank lots of milk. While he slept, he spit up lots of milk. He probably developed an allergy to cow's milk and then beef because of the protein being excreted into the breast milk. Unlike his older brother, child number 2 did not sleep through the night until after age 2.
It is possible that if he had been fed formula that he would have developed more severe allergies at an earlier stage. Possibly I would have never been able to find a formula to fit his needs.
What I have learned is that each parent must decide for themselves what best fits their needs and life. For me, breast feeding was the easiest, most portable, and cheapest route to go. I quickly learned to nurse while lying down to take care of those middle of the night feedings. I kept his crib next to my bed until he was 3 months old. I never had to wash bottles or mix up formula. I simply lifted my blouse and was ready to go. No bottles, bottle brushes, nipples, bottle warmers, nipple brushes, cans of formula. Nursing gave me an excuse to hold and cuddle my babies. When they were done eating, I pulled out little board books and read to them starting when they were only 2 months old. Perhaps that is why they both read so early and are great readers and writers today.
Nursing worked for me. I always tell expectant mothers--try it for thirty days, money back guaranteed. If you are not happy, spend your money, buy the bottles, and use formula. You have to do what is comfortable for you and not let anyone try to make you feel guilty. I think the cuddling, holding, and loving breast fed babies get is what matters most. While you can't prop up a breast, you can a bottle. Hold your baby close to you to feed him and love him up afterwards. That will matter most in the scheme of things.
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Epinions.com ID:
msilvermare
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Member: Margaret Silver
Location: Orange County, California
Reviews written: 80
Trusted by: 42 members
About Me:
I am a special education teacher and educational therapist at a middle school.
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