DavidK93 is hosting a W/O to commemorate his anniversary here at good ol' Epiland. How could I resist? I mean hell, this is a cigar review, and I'm a chick... How else could I review it other than in a drunken fog?
Ok, it's after 5pm so I guess I can commence to drinkin. Nick is out of town right now and I don't normally drink, so boy is he gonna be surprised to get home this weekend and see his booze stash depleted.. weeeeeeeeeee
[mixes kalhua and milk and takes a big ol' swig]
Who hasn't watched or read The Count of Monte Cristo? Go ahead, raise you hands...
What? That many? Shame on you... you should be flogged.
That brings me to this cigar. It's called Montecristo. (like that drunken sguay.. crap.. rule is no backspacing, dseal with that typo..) Duh. Why else would I have even bought the damn things? Ok let me back up here a second... I do, on occassion, smoke those cute little Al Capones that are really just a dark colored cigarette but sold at cigar stores. So one day we're wandering around JR Tobacco and I'm lookin at the Capones.. then I see this really cool lookin tin..and guess what! It has swords on it! HUZZAH! Had ta have it man.
And it wasn't just swords. No. It was called Montecristo! Say it with me: Monty-CrEEEEEsto. That's right. Ya gotta say it uppity-like because, dude, like this brand is the crem de la creme of the cigar world. Very pricey, in fact this little tin of ten weee cigars was 11 bucks. yeesh. But like.. they're symbol is a buncha swords crossing each other in a triangle. This size is called Memories.
[drinks some more and lights up a Monty-CrEEEEEsto]
(psst.. don't tell Nick but I'm usin' his expensive cigar cutter and lighter especially for htis occasion..)
Now where was I? Oh yes.. when I bought these, I was expecting to open to tin to find more little dark cigaretes like the Capones. Nope. These are for real cigars here. Small ones, granted, but full blown cigars none the less. Most Monty-CrEEEEEstos are hand wrapped, but these are not. Sorry. Machine all the way. Still... swooooooords damn it!
Ok so what do ya want to know besides it's machine wrapped and filled with tobacco? Ahh the draaaaaaaaaw... smooth as a baby's butt..err that sounded kinky, eh? Smooth as a cigarette? That doesn't sound as witty, does it? At any rate, you don't have to collapse your lungs to smoke this like with some of the ones HE buys.. I've seen this described as 'ultra-smooth.'
The Memories are made in the Dominican Republic by elves.. wait, I don't think that last part is right. Teach me to listen to my damn cats.. Thesee cute lil thanfgs are all of 4.00 in length (you REAL cigar smokers will know what that means, the rest of ya can just ummm buy one).
The ring size.. I think I'm spose to mention the ring size.. err... the band won't fit on my pinky finger so umm prolly like a size 2 or 3? Ehhhh oh yeah, the ring size is 30 (which I figure really means a 3 cuz this whole size thang is a male deal and you know how they like to exaggerate....)
[definately need another drink after that one..]
The ash is also indicative of the quality, so I'm told. This one I've gotten one big ol' continuous ash goin on to about half the cigar length... at which point I wuss out and flick the damn thing. I'd say that's pretty good... I mean it IS a Monty-CrEEEEEsto after all, so it's the bestest. heh. It also burns well, meaning no tunneling effect and no lop-sided crap.
This is classified as a Mild-Medium and I agree wit that. Nicvk is always stickin his cigars in my face and making me try them.. this is milder than most of his.
The wrapper is, I think, a Neutral Connecticut type. That means it's a kinda medium colored brown, almost a golden brown. The tobacco is Dominican grown and I believe it is one long leaf with added filler tobacco, so a combo of what you usually find in most cigars.
Now to the taste. Umm errr.. it tastes like tobacco. Welllll damn it, it does! Ok, if yer gonna force me on this one.. hmm woodsy I'd say. I don't detect any hints of chocolate or anything, just good ol' Dominican Republic tobacco leaf. Really, woodsy is the only word I can come up with. It does finish nicely, it doesn't get too overly hot like some of the bigger ones do.
Ok now I'm just getting sleepy from the booze... I think I've covered it all.. Ihope. Hate to, like, have my rep ruined and all...
So, I do recommend this one for those times you don't want to smoke a big ol cigar yet want the taste of a Monty-CrEEEEEsto. The tin is easy to keep in your purse or brief case, and these do not require a humidor... well, ok so I haven't let them sit out for months so I can't say that last part for sure.. but I said it anyway.. damn rule about no backspacing or erasing. bah.
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