A Wonder
Written: Nov 15 '01 (Updated Nov 19 '01)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Spurred NEWSWEEK's Jeff Giles to write a great article on Mr. Braithwaite.
Cons: The writing style, the characters, the setting, the plot...none of it works.
The Bottom Line: Stay away from it. It'll hurt you.
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| zoned233's Full Review: Kent Braithwaite - The Wonderland Murders |
THE WONDERLAND MURDERS may well be the Plan Nine From Outer Space of mystery novels. (This would, I suppose, make its author, Kent Braithwaite, the Edward D. Wood, Jr. of mystery novelists. Both seem to have approached their works with brazen, even gleeful ineptitude.)
The book was subsidy published (which means Mr. Braithwaite paid for its publication) by Four Seasons Publishing. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing in and of itself – even the great Edgar Allen Poe once subsidized the publication of his work – but I do wonder if he (Braithwaite, not Poe) tried his manuscript out on the pros first…and what might their opinions have been?
My opinion (or epinion) is this: It is drivel. It is rubbish. It is cardboard characters spewing hackneyed lines in settings which come off as having no more depth than the paper they’re printed on. And speaking of paper, I’m reminded of the old (and pretty hackneyed itself, sorry) reviewer’s line which goes something like: “One suggested use of this book’s pages would be for the lining of birdcages.” I wouldn’t suggest this, however, lest you risk the ire of PETA. And if your bird happens to be a parrot…well, I shudder to think what words it might screech at you for your offense.
The story concerns one Jesse Ascencio, a poetry-writing Latino “private cop” who often bemoans the state of racism against his people, even while acknowledging that he himself was once a successful FBI agent and a California Congressman of high repute. Jesse is handsome. Jesse is rugged. Jesse is a HERO. Jesse is a private eye, whose eyes get a whole lot of exercise, as illustrated here:
"My eyes skipped from the detective’s face up the path twenty-five yards…"
And here:
"I raised my eyes to the stars. Gazing briefly across the universe, I saw no answers to my destiny, yet I knew I was destined for a long night."
Did I mention? Jesse is also deep. Very deep.
There’s more fun to be had with Mr. Braithwaite’s pseudo-novel. Go to Amazon’s or Barnes & Noble’s websites and read the obviously phony (and one deliciously-yet-mildly sarcastic) 5-star reviews of the thing and you’ll see what I mean (and if you’re lucky you might even be able to catch the 1-star opinions before they’re deleted – due to offensive honesty, one suspects).
THE WONDERLAND MURDERS has caused quite a stir recently, even spurring Jeff Giles of NEWSWEEK (www.msnbc.com/news/647739.asp?cp1=1) to write an article about the illustrious Mr. Braithwaite, entitled SEE MORE ABOUT ME. It’s a hoot.
Recommended:
No
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Epinions.com ID:
zoned233
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Reviews written: 2
Trusted by: 1 member
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