“What a great movie this will be!” I thought. Pierce Brosnan, Jamie Lee Curtis, the natural beauty of Panama, intrigue, corruption – all based on John LeCarre’s acclaimed novel of the same name. I watched it all from a comfortable ‘stadium seat’ in a THX-equipped theater. What more could I ask?

Apparently, a lot. I was surprised to learn that author John LeCarre was involved in the writing of the script. How could such a celebrated author miss the mark so badly? Columbia Tri-Star Pictures’ press release says that Director John Boorman modified LeCarre’s original script. “Butchered” is the word that first comes to my mind.


The Story

Andy Osnard (Pierce Brosnan) is an unscrupulous British spy banished to Panama for outlandish sexual conduct on his previous assignment. While British Intelligence believes he is there merely to monitor British interests in the Panama Canal, Osnard has his own dishonest agenda.

In order to dig up the information he’ll need to carry out his plan, Osnard enlists the help of a well-connected tailor named Harry Pendel (Geoffrey Rush). Harry at first refuses Osnard's offensive approach, but Osnard knows about Harry’s hidden past and the debts he has kept secret from his wife Louisa (Jamie Lee Curtis). Osnard is willing to keep quiet and provide the money to pay off Harry’s debts in exchange for information Harry, it would seem, is privy to – information gleaned in his fitting sessions with the political elite of Panama.

As the story unfolds, we learn that Harry has nothing of substance to disclose, but pressured by Osnard he begins to fabricate ‘information’ about a secret plan to sell the Panama Canal to the Chinese. The plan is somewhat believable because of Panama’s corrupt political climate and state of poverty.

When Osnard informs British Intelligence of the supposed plan, he requests 15 million dollars to finance an imaginary “silent opposition”. Again, his plan is believable because of a long history of speculation and rumors about the silent opposition.

In the end, Osnard makes off with the 15 million dollars, leaving a trail of ruin behind him.

Special Effects?

You were expecting, perhaps, James Bond?

If you’re used to spy thrillers, you’ll most likely expect a string of special effects. If so, you’ll be sorely disappointed. While certain aspects of the cinematography are aesthetically pleasing, this is not an action movie. Special effects play only a minor role. Even shots of the airplane flying Osnard to Panama are dull and amateurish.

The Flavor of Panama

Although the cinematography has its ups and downs, there are moments that capture the natural beauty, poverty, and corruption that is Panama. Unfortunately those moments are too few to make the movie worth seeing.

What Works

Leonor Varela brings so much more to her role as Harry’s business manager than the script provides her. Although her considerable beauty is masked behind a terrible disfigurement, her haunting stare and on-screen presence far surpass anything the rest of the cast can muster – even though they are far more experienced.

What Doesn’t Work

The Script: I was never drawn in to the story. There was little to draw my interest, ignite my emotions, allow me to escape, or cause me to think.

Pierce Brosnan as a Foul-Mouthed Villain: Pierce Brosnan just doesn’t make a believable villain. Perhaps it’s his carefully cultivated Bond persona, sophisticated accent, polished demeanor, and natural charm. One of the ways the movie attempts to paint him as a villain is to pepper his speech with obscenities. But his refined British accent simply does not mix with profanity. It’s a combination that is wholly unnatural. As a result, his character is not believable. The words sound as though they don’t belong, and we focus on that incoherence instead of the story.

Believe me, I’m not against colorful language. Ride with me on an L.A. Freeway some day and you may just get an earful! But the language in this particular script is completely out of place.

The Sex: Although there are two somewhat tasteful (albeit short) sex scenes, the majority of the sex in “The Tailor of Panama” is there for shock value and not romance or intrigue. In fact, there really is no romantic aspect to the story! That’s too bad, because the location and the cast provided a rich opportunity. The weak script just never delivered.

Don’t get me wrong: like most guys I’m all in favor of a little sex at the movies. And it’s pretty hard to offend me. I just don’t think the language or the sex in this particular movie did anything to add to the story. In fact, I had the distinct impression they were thrown in to drive box office revenues by earning the film an ‘R’ rating.

Unrealized Potential

Panama offers such an incredibly rich setting for a story of this type. Its natural beauty, poverty, political climate, and strategic value to international shipping hold a vast treasure of intriguing stories just waiting to be told. John LeCarre’s book of the same name was widely acclaimed for its imagery, intrigue, and mastery of suspense.

Perhaps the movie is so disappointing because we see the potential. We want to be drawn in. We want to experience the beauty, the emotion, and the passion!

But “The Tailor of Panama” does not deliver.

Summary

Disappointingly, “The Tailor of Panama” falls far short of its tremendous potential. Read the book, but skip the movie.






Recommended:
No

Suitability For Children: Not suitable for Children of any age