Switzerland – Yodelaheehoo. The world’s prettiest country. Engelberg and the Titlis
Written: Aug 07 '07 (Updated Aug 07 '07)
|
Product Rating:
|
|
|
Pros: Clean, Safe, Very Pretty
Cons: Very Expensive, a bit Dull
The Bottom Line: Fantastic place for skiing and walking. Incredible scenery. If you want a rural paradise then Switzerland delivers.
|
|
|
| travelgall's Full Review: Switzerland |
I first went to Switzerland about 10 years ago to the Italian speaking part of the country situated around Lugano. Switzerland is quite handy for the Italians living on this side of Milan as you can fill up your car with fuel and by a pack of cigarettes far cheaper than you can in Italy itself. It is also useful for higher end form of tax evasion and Italians constantly nip over the boarder to hide some of their earnings from the tax authorities. Lugano is a pretty town found in the Canton Ticino region of Switzerland, naturally found on the other side of the Italian border near Como. The Italian Prime Minister has recently gone on record whining that the church doesn’t preach that tax avoidance is a sin at mass. Personally I admire the Italian spirit of not letting the state squander all their hard earned money. Anyhow, Lugano is a pretty town. Other than the Museum of Modern Art which I toured and disliked – nothing personal to this particular museum; I dislike practically all modern art despite having Rene Magritte’s “The son of Man” hanging up in my house. There are a couple of pretty churches and villages that surround the lake, and tourists arrive in droves for a trip on one of the boats that depart from the centre of Lugano. The town is quiet like all of Switzerland but very pretty, being found on Lake Lugano and having a spectacular mountain backdrop. Unfortunately the town is now full of Celebrities – (read vacuous actors) so you may find the odd road or shopping centre round Lugano blocked by a giant Hollywood ego.
However it’s been a while since my last visit but a couple of very good friends were getting married. I had to do a speech at the wedding, thought it would be a good opportunity to pop into the head office (I’m now a Swiss Banker) and thus decided to make the trip. Getting to Engelberg is easy as it involves Swiss rail, which is probably the cleanest and most reliable in the world. When I thought my train from the Hauptbahnhoff had set off 30 seconds late I actually reset my watch back thirty seconds. You literally can set your watch by Swiss rail, it’s comfortable too. Even in second class you get big sofa type chairs that fit four people; or comfortable single seats with tables. It’s hard to describe how nice Swiss rail is, but certainly kicks British Rail into touch. We too the Inter-city from Zurich to Lucerne via a town called Zug and another town – appropriately for Switzerland called Red Cross. Having eaten a Chilli Dog for lunch I tucked into a couple of bags of Harribo gummy bears which I selfishly refused to share equally with my girlfriend. She gets all the Chocolate though, and nicked the complimentary one on the bed in my room – something that was presented to me as a Fait accomplis. We then switched to a small regional railway with huge windows that give you a fantastic view. Not quite as comfortable as the inter city but certainly blessed with a better view as we wound into the mountains. At first we moved at a fair pace, but then the train switched method of propulsion as we climbed up 50 degree angles using some cog method.
The wedding was in Engelberg; which is basically an overgrown village that caters for walkers and paragliders in summer, skiers in the winter. The Groom was English of Swiss heritage, the bride was Brazilian so it was good to see how these two traditions would match. The hotel we stayed at was the Hotel Engelberg, a pleasant enough three star hotel with breakfast thrown in. It was a bit dated, the bed only had one feather pillow, the lights in the bathroom rendered you temporarily blind if you were exposed for long periods being more suited for operating theatres than bathrooms, and there was a lack of facilities (nothing other than the bed and bathroom). On the plus side the staff was very pleasant, it was spotlessly clean; had a nice balcony and bags of storage which will be useful in the winter if you want to store your ski equipment. The breakfast was a simple continental affair but nevertheless very tasty. It was too expensive in terms of an overall package (Engelberg isn’t Klosters or St Moritz) but you could do far worse if staying in Switzerland. The other advantage of the hotel is that it is on the main cobbled street and has a warm if uncharismatic bar underneath it, again useful if you arrive in the winter. I had a look at the ski runs and all of them seem to be Black or worse, you probably need some liquid courage before attempting them – not that I’m an expert skier I should say.
The town is fairly small despite its good range of large two and three star hotels. There are higher rated hotels in Engelberg; yet as far as I understand none of them deserve more than three stars. The Hotel Europe could probably obtain this rating if it wanted due to the good Chefs and waiting staff, and its general ambiance of faded glory but surprisingly it hasn’t gone for a higher rating. The Edelweiss hotel is supposed to be good too, in fact I doubt Switzerland would have their reputation sullied by a lousy one, the government will probably put in a compulsory purchase if there’s a fly in your soup. But none of them will be out of this world special as the resort is so small, and all of them will be overpriced compared to something you could get in a mountain resort elsewhere in the world – thing Italy, Colorado etc. Switzerland isn’t cheap due to its incredibly high standard of living, and no matter what the guide books say about it being equally priced with the rest of Europe it simply isn’t true. Or at least it isn’t true unless you eat at Burger King and stay in a youth hostel for the entire trip. A few things are cheaper, such as a spiffy North Face body warmer I bought in the sales for my trip up the Titlis; but by in large if you want to enjoy a cheap restaurant in Zurich for example, you will need to take the short drive to Germany.
Food in Switzerland is a fun but calorie packed affair, designed for those days when you’re carrying your Alpine Horn and St Bernard up the snow covered hills and burning about 6000 calories rather than the usual 400. The Swiss do of course eat healthily; they do so by travelling to Italy or France for dinner if they live near those respective boarders. Switzerland is of course famous for Fondue, a rather fun packed affair. Fondue comes in two forms, Cheese Fondue where you eat bread with it, or alternatively Steak fondue cooked in hot Oil boiling away merrily on your table with a fuel burner underneath. I now know why Switzerland is yet to join the EU, the Health and Safety Nazis would have a field day and ban Switzerland’s national dish before you could say “No Referendum”. The etiquette for Fondue is as follows…
1) Take a metal stick
2) poke it through your food – bread or steak,
3) twirl the food around in a bowl full of either melted cheese or hot oil,
4) remove the stick,
5) find your food has dropped off in the bowl,
6) fish around for it,
7) stab it again,
8) miss,
9) stab it again,
10) remove from oil or cheese,
11) catch meat or bread on lip of cheese pot or oil pot
12) say F**k it
13) Return to step one
Nevertheless this is what I call fun eating, especially since it will annoy the above mentioned Safety Nazis. You get Rice, Chips (English) /French Fries (American) and an assortment of dips such as Curry mayonnaise, some form of Cocktail coloured sauce and mini corn on the cobs. They also put Pineapple with it for no reason on Gods good earth which I loathe. All in all this is a real artery clogger but compared with the Cheese Fondue can actually be called the healthy option. We ordered a Potato Rosti too, which is basically a plate sized hash brown. All in all Swiss food should be taken in moderation - just like its German neighbour. The rest of the Swiss palate is very heavily influenced by Germany and Austria rather than Italy and France. Plenty of Wiener schnitzel in hunter sauce – light on the Aardvark droppings drizzled with Kumquat oil that you get in the Mediterranean countries.
There are several restaurants in the town producing this type of fare, other than that there isn’t much to Engelberg. When we were in Engelberg there was a nice little Jazz Festival (Really nice – grrrrreat) which I’m not a big fan of. Everything else is pretty limited too, there’s more shops than you would expect for a village but not much else in the way of attractions. The shops include a few ski shops – naturally, clothing stores including Benetton so you can look pretty climbing the hills and the tourist stores selling Cow bells and items with Swiss flags on them. The Swiss are without any shadow of a doubt the worst dressers in Europe – a point I will cover in my Zurich review, so you should be weary of buying any form of clothing in this country. You are expected to make your own entertainment in Switzerland (shopping isn’t considered entertainment) by climbing mountains and then paragliding off them. If you’re not an outdoors kind of person then believe me that Switzerland is probably the most boring place in the world. Why this town is so small is a surprise however, as despite the fact that it is a retirement and second home town in essence; it is situated next to one of Switzerland’s main attractions – the Titlis.
The Titlis is supposed to be the highest viewing point in Central Switzerland. Naturally you can get higher but this involves Crampons, Pitons and the threat of a rather long fall. The Tiils can be reached by a mere three cable cars, the last one is called the Rotair and the Swiss are rather proud of the fact that it is the world’s first revolving gondola which means that there is no mad rush to grab the best place to stand. It costs 85 Chf for adults, no idea how much they charge for kids. The first stage involves a small 6 person gondola that is decorated either with a countries flag or Swiss Canton flag. Being rather handy at Vexillology I bored my Girlfriend and a French mate from the wedding something chronic by identifying every flag on the way down. Swat up on the world’s flags and bore them too if you wish. The first part of the trip takes about 20 minutes once you actually get on the gondola – we had to wait about 10 minutes. The trip is very steep and they jam the maximum amount of people possible in these tiny Gondolas. So… if you want to ensure a safe and comfortable ride pretend to do your shoe laces and let people past if you spot a fat bloke right in front or behind you. The ride is beautiful and peaceful, only the slight whir of the cable car and the bells attached to all Swiss cows will disturb your tranquil ride up to the Trubsee. Once you arrive at the Trubsee, or better yet on the way back down be sure to leave the cable car station and have a quick look at the beautiful lake that is found at this level. When we did the trip all three of us agreed that this was the best view of the whole journey.
From the Trubsee you then get on a large 80 person gondola to Stand. This trip isn’t as much fun as they cram as many of you as possible into this car. The view isn’t bad but nowhere as good as either the Rotair or the 6 person Gondola. Because there were so many people crammed in we occupied our self with naming films that featured Cable Cars. We came up with “Where Eagles Dare“and “Moonraker” and were then stuck. If you can name any more please put them in the comments page. There is a restaurant on this stage, which will probably be quieter and cheaper as hardly anybody gets off at this level during the summer season. It looked pretty closed when we were there though. The last stage from Stand to the Titlis is on the afore mentioned Rotair which revolves as it winds its way out to the top of the Titlis. The actual cable car itself does not revolve; it is the floor inside that does the turning. Nevertheless it allows you to get great views both up and down the mountain. The Titlis itself is 5 floors with a viewing deck on top. It has incredible views of the glacier on the Titlis along with views of all the incredible mountain peaks of Switzerland. It gets very cold up there, it was 28 degrees centigrade in Engelberg, and it was 6 degrees centigrade on the Titlis itself.
There is another chair lift on the top that takes you over the glacier, called the Ice Flyer and you can ride inflatable doughnuts down the glacier too if you so choose. There is also an Ice cave that I failed to spot at all, and every Sunday in the summer they offer a Glacier walk. The glacier was pretty slushy when I went (so don’t wear your best Prada loafers) but you can clamber around the place. We had a snackette in the “Restaurant” at the top. Naturally at the op of this incredible viewpoint they charge like wounded bulls. I bought 3 bottles of water, a plate of fries and 6 mini vegetable Samosas for about 30 Chf which is a bit steep in anybody’s language. There is also a watch shop in case you want to buy something at 10,000 feet rather than at a lower and less exalted duty free altitude and be charged accordingly. Basically go there for the view, enjoy it and leave the buying for the mugs with cash to burn. One thing that is amusing though is a photo shop where you get togged up in the native fancy dress / national costume of Switzerland and the photo can be aged according to the era of dress you are in. They have all the “Famous” people who have posed on the walls. Most of them are Chinese or Korean actresses, along with the Bollywood blokes. But there is also one of the Pythons on the wall and some actors who have appeared in Eastenders – a British soap that I haven’t watched on the grounds that I believe that people who watch soap operas shouldn’t be given the vote. Therefore I didn’t know who they were.
It’s hard to describe how pretty rural Switzerland is. The Snow capped mountains with green fields at the base dissected by ice cold crystal clear rivers. It is a great place to take a walking holiday, especially as the only noise you are likely to hear are the cows with their bells clanking away. I assume they are forced to wear them so they can be found in snowstorms but in all honestly I have no idea. Disappointingly none of the Cows are Purple and White. One interesting thing about this region is the number of times it has featured in Indian movies. As Kashmir is considered too dangerous to film in, then Engelberg doubles for it when the Indian Army is shooting terrorists before doing a little song and dance number. If you haven’t seen a Bollywood movie I will describe it… Noble hero fancies girl above/below social status, they have a dance, love lorn heroin reciprocates – dance & lip synch sing song, parents disapprove – dance; Hero fights evil villain – ridiculous fight scene – dance at end, parents relent – dance and lip synch sing song. Engelberg is full of Indians and so you get Swiss food and Pizzas topped with Curry Powder. I like that though as I love Indian food; and Swiss food is not only deeply unhealthy, it is also on the bland side.
Crime on the other hand is practically non existent, since every house is required by law to have an Assault Rifle and 120+ rounds of ammunition with it. Switzerland still has conscription, and you take your rifle home with you at the end of the day. They say a well armed society is a polite society – it certainly is in Switzerlands’ case. Furthermore gun crime is non-existent which causes Michael Moore more than the odd problem as the country is literally awash with firearms. They are also fabulously democratic, and constantly actually ask their people what they think. The Swiss probably have 30 or 40 Referendum a year on everything from street cleaning to joining the EU. Compared to either Britain or the US they are paragons of virtue, compared to others in Democratic terms they are practically on another planet. The place is so pretty too, you see it in the houses that people care about making their place feel beautiful; not only or them but for their neighbours too. Indeed with all the Swiss flags flying outside their houses Switzerland is very reminiscent of the US in its visible patriotism.
Naturally the clean streets and crime free country is nearly everybody’s ideal of happiness. I’m weird though and love a bit of urban hustle and bustle, something which Switzerland just cannot provide. And then there is the ugly side of this beautiful country, not everything is peaches and light. Don’t forget, just like that other paragon of European heaven – Sweden, Switzerland’s wealth and high standard of living is built on atrocity, misery and death. Swiss banks were taking looted gold from the Reich until its final days in return for Armaments; they blocked any Jews from entry despite being the headquarters of the Red Cross, and even now they are hardly forthcoming about when an African dictator parks his ill gotten cash. As I mentioned earlier, I have no problem with people hiding a bit of spare cash from their own thieving governments, but it’s a bit different when its Terrorists or Bob Mugabe. I work for a Swiss bank and there are rules in place IN LONDON to stop this kind of money laundering but the Swiss are still seen as less than co-operative on certain matters by numerous governments. Their neutrality means that they have not stood up and been counted any time evil has reared its ugly head. Also like Sweden, their economy has not faced the icy blast of competition. The Swiss are happy for their countries companies to take over others; but don’t even think of taking over a Swiss company as a foreigner – Switzerland is probably the only place in Europe that still has a Poison Pill approach to takeover from foreign companies. As a result a much of their industry is ossified as the collapse of Swissair amongst others proves, and gives poor value to the average Swiss consumer.
I’m not going to finish this review on a negative point though, if you come to Switzerland you must know what to expect, and that is a Rural ideal. Switzerland certainly delivers this in bucket loads. It is eye achingly beautiful, the people seem nice enough and for the outdoors man or woman I can’t think of anywhere else in the world that delivers this much variety in this small a place. Granted you can do many of the things that Switzerland has in the Rockies or elsewhere, and it’s probably twice the price of the US or Canada. But you have to go hundreds of miles to do each different thing in the US or Canada, in Switzerland it’s all in one smaller country with much better transport links. Obviously the US and Canada have more to offer than just mountains and skiing, but if that’s what you want then Switzerland certainly offers some stiff competition.
Recommended:
Yes
Best Suited For: Couples
Best Time to Travel Here: Anytime
|
|
|
|
Epinions.com ID:
travelgall
|
 - Top 1000 |
|
Location: London, Great Britain
Reviews written: 104
Trusted by: 95 members
About Me:
Ex Army Stockbroker who spend all his cash on traveling.
Corruptissima Republica, Plurimae Leges.
|
|
|
- Add to My Yahoo!: 
- Add to Google Homepage: 
© 1999-2009 Shopping.com, Inc.