From the Twisty Caminos of Old Town Vallarta to the Sandy Beaches of Mismaloya, Puerto Vallarta Offers Something for Everyone
Written: Dec 20 '99
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Product Rating:
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Pros: lots to do, old part of town is very cool, great weather
Cons: too many timeshare salesmen, too many vendors
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| mrkstvns's Full Review: Puerto Vallarta |
Looking for a beach resort that offers a traditional mexican flavor with lots of fun things to do? You might be looking for Puerto Vallarta, where you can lay out on the beach all day or do a boat tour, then cruise around town searching the shops for the best bargains and restaurants all night.
Walking the streets in the old part of Puerto Vallarta is a real joy. The streets are generally narrow cobblestone thoroughfares, many of which twist around or climb the hillside at almost impossibly steep grades. Stroll up behind the cathedral and you can snap the picture of the stunningly ornate iron belfry tower that graces postcards you see in the shops. Climb up the narrow stairs or streets and you'll see some of the fabulous balconies of houses and their incredible panoramic view of the city below them and the Bahia Banderas stretched out to the Pacific. Many of these houses look starkly uninteresting, or even rundown if you pass them on the street, it's only from the sides or from the bird's eye view that you can appreciate just how dramatic they are, or why they are so expensive if you try to buy one. Many gringos own homes in the hills overlooking the town and there is a neighborhood with so many rich americans living there that the natives call it "gringo gulch". Of course the most famous of these houses are the homes of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton with their so-called "love bridge" spanning over the street and covered with pink bouganvilleas. These homes now constitute a bed and breakfast inn called Casa Kimberly, which is also open for tours. We were also told that it is for sale, if you happen to have a few spare million laying around...
The Rio Cuale flows through the middle of Puerto Vallarta, emptying into the Bahia Banderas. Near the river's mouth is an island park that features small shops, restaurants, and a small museum about the city. The shops sport, for the most part, the same types of souvenir items that you'd find in the market, and at comparable prices. The very tip of the island at the river's mouth is Oscar's restaurant, which offers great views of the bay and the beach. The opposite end of the park feels more quiet and serene and there are several empty buildings and a few that seem to be occassionally occupied by artisan groups. About the only real attraction of this area, other than a safe haven from the throngs of vendors and time share representatives, is a small restaurant that serves the coldest beer in Puerto Vallarta. Very quiet and cozy, I could have spent a whole day here, swilling beer and throwing an occassional table scrap to Gloria, the black and white cat who strolls around as if she owns the place. One of the coolest things at the park is to cross one of the two swinging bridges. A few broken boards in each bridge help instill a suitable feeling of impending doom. One of these bridges leads directly to the city's central market.
The central market is the place to go for souvenirs. The building is pretty big -- two floors and an entire city block. The market is very tourist oriented, however, with primarily T-shirts, mexican crafts, and various souvenirs. The second floor has a handful of food vendors and a few more souvenir vendors. While it is certainly set up as a typical mexican market, it's not like those that you'd find in a real working and living city. It's a huge contrast from the big Mercado Libertad in Guadalajara, which is much more authentic in that it serves as a grocery store, department store, and restaurant all rolled into one (see my epinion on Guadalajara for more info). The market in Puerto Vallarta does not sell vegetables or meats, it does not sell hardware, household goods, nor clothing other than T-shirts and hats emblazoned with pink Puerto Vallarta logos. But it is a great place to get great deals on souvenirs. Many vendors would sell you 4 T-shirts for 100 pesos (about $10) or saddle blankets for 50 pesos ($5). Less if you knew how to haggle. Even less if you knew how to haggle in spanish.
In the evenings, the place to be is the Malecon -- sort of the boardwalk of Puerto Vallarta. The Malecon is a sidewalk on the seawall along the beach in the heart of downtown. Couples stroll along here hand in hand, and families walk along, perhaps stopping in at the various shops, or maybe heading towards the amphitheatre stage at one end. There is a group of maybe 10 or so fanciful brass thronelike chairs that are similar to those found outside the Cabaņas Culturas in Guadalajara. There are plenty of nightclubs and bars along the Malecon, mostly catering to the young crowd. The Zoo Bar and Carlos O'Brien's seem to be a couple of the more popular spots.
While I enjoy Sabrina's epinions, I generally don't agree with her assessment that Puerto Vallarta is "too american." However, a walk down the Malecon is the one place where I might see where she could come to that opinion. The Malecon starts at one end with a McDonald's and ends at the other with a Hooters. Within a block of the Malecon there is a Planet Hollywood and a Hard Rock Cafe. On the other hand, these are pretty much the only real gringo places in Puerto Vallarta, and to their credit, most of the people I saw seemed to have sniffed out the better restaurants and bars located nearby. If you want trashy american culture, you can find it in Puerto Vallarta, but I definitely find it to be much less obnoxious than in clearly gringo-oriented Cancun.
Beaches and watersports are, of course, the main draw, however if playing in the surf is really your bag, you might want to consider a resort area like Cozumel or Cancun instead -- the Pacific is rougher and colder, the beaches are courser and browner, and the water lacks the incredible color and clarity that it has on the Atlantic side. The scenery is incredible though. Much of the shoreline along the bay is pretty rocky and rugged, although there are also some excellent beaches. Some of the best are located near the major hotels along the main drag, near the marina area, and outside the city limits in both directions. Probably the most famous beach is Mismaloya Beach, which was the setting for John Huston's movie "Night of the Iguana". There are some fabulous hotels along this beach and access from downtown is easy -- take a taxi, or pay 3 pesos to take the bus (look for the one marked "Mismaloya"). There are also some other beaches located further out along the bay, but the road doesn't go there. Several boat tours will take you to these beaches, and there are restaurants and bars there offering refreshments.
We rented a Volkswagen beetle convertible for a day for 500 pesos and went up into the jungle hills above Mismaloya Beach to an area called El Eden. (There are also horseback trips that you can take to here from the Mismaloya area.) This was where the Arnold Schwarzenegger movie "Predator" was filmed. The road is rocky, rough, and dirty, and absolutely filled with potholes and other obstacles. Looks like the kind of road you see in Jeep commercials, but the Volkswagen took it right in stride. You travel this road for several miles, twisting along through the jungle, climing higher and higher up the mountain. Finally you come to a clearing and there's a restaurant. Walk through the restaurant and there's a beautiful crystal clear pool with a natural waterfull dumping into it. A rope swing hangs from one deck of the restaurant out over the pool, and you can climb the rocks and slide down the waterfall into the pool. What a blast! After playing in the water for a while, you can climb out and have a few tacos and brewskis while you watch other folks jumping in. The best part of watching is that the unsuspecting saps see people in the water, so they just peel off their shirts and dive in. Woof! The water is like 50 degrees so they invariably pop to the surface faster than Jon Benet Ramsey's parents ducking out of Boulder.
Later in the day we crossed over the other side of Puerto Vallarta and drove up into the neighboring state of Nayarit. There are a couple of resort areas up in this area, including Nuevo Vallarta, but generally it's less desirable than being in PV itself. There is a beach area called Destelero which is pretty nice, and there's an area at the very end of the bay called Punta Mita that's pretty run-down as far as towns go, but that offers a strip of restaurants and bars with a view of the Marietas islands. The beach here is kind of dirty and cluttered, but it's still very nice to sit at one of the beachside restaurants, dig your toes into the sand, and just chill out for an afternoon enjoying the cheap beer and good fresh seafood. This is definitely not the place to go though if you don't like vendors, since you will be approached exactly 27 times per hour. My brother in law talked with one of the boat guys and he agreed to take us both out to the Marietas for 300 pesos. We grabbed our cooler of Tecates, climbed into the decrepit looking fiberglass boat, and off we went. My brother in law managed to catch a couple of fish on the way, including a small shark, which the boat captain wanted to keep. A couple of shots of tequila later and the captain was stowing the shark in his ice chest. There are also boat tours out to the Marietas from Puerto Vallarta, but it'll take a lot longer than a couple hours time to zip out there, and it'll cost a lot more than 300 pesos.
There are tons of tours and trips of all kinds available around Puerto Vallarta. We found that you can get info on these trips at the hotel, or you will be approached by people in "information booths" along the city streets who will offer to tell you about the tours. They do, indeed, tell you about the tours, but they always manage to steer to the conversation towards invitations to time-share sales events where you can get a free lunch, free drinks, and by the way, vouchers for half price discounts on the tours. Better to call the tour operators direct or book via the hotel. The price is higher, but you can spare yourself the wasted time of a high pressure sales presentation.
Some of the coolest tours are the boat tours out to the remote beaches on the south side of Puerto Vallarta, past Mismaloya beach. These go past the huge rock formations that I think are called Los Arcos. There is also a cruise boat called Magdalena that looks like a spanish galleon. This boat goes out for day trips towards the Marietas and offers sunset dinner cruises. The sunset cruise features lots of entertainment, including charros, mariachis, a pirate boarding, and they launch fireworks as they cruise about 50 yards off the Malecon. I didn't take the cruise, but I watched it a couple of nights from the balcony of the Viejo Vallarta restaurant.
There are also jungle tours that go out in trucks, and there are places that rent dune buggies (called "pathfinders" in mexico). I saw one of these places on the road heading out toward the airport, near the turnoff for the marina.
Where to Stay:
There are tons of hotels in all classes and price ranges. The three main hotel areas are the hotel strip, the marina area, and along the road toward Mismaloya Beach.
Along the hotel strip, the biggie seems to be the Sheraton Bouganvillea. Big towers right on the beach. Nearby is also the Krystal. Much of the hotel strip seems a bit seedy and noisy to me. Much of the area between the old city and the marina area looks pretty run down. This is also the area where the cruise ships dock, and there's a Plaza de Toros with bullfights Wednesdays at 5pm.
Toward Mismaloya are many of the upscale hotels, including the Camino Real and the InterContinental Presidente. At the end of the beach is the very classy La Jolla de Mismaloya. The coast along here is very dramatic and the area quite beautiful. The downside is that it's a bit remote from downtown.
The marina area is fairly new. Nothing more than about 10 years old. I stayed the first night at the Club Embarcadero Pacifico, which was very big, modern, clean, and relatively inexpensive, probably because it is not directly on the beach. Cost was about $80 per night for two, including meals. They offer all-inclusive plans and they have some very nice restaurants with a nice marina/waterfront one where you can watch the boats come and go as you enjoy your breakfast. The next night I moved further down to Velas Vallarta, which is a big place right on the beach. Also very modern and clean, they have beautifully manicured gardens and pools.
I think if I go again, I'd prefer to stay somewhere along the road to Mismaloya. It seems to be the nicest area in Puerto Vallarta with the most stunning scenery.
Getting There:
Puerto Vallarta's airport is a couple miles north of town right on the coast. It is within spitting distance of some of the marina area hotels. The airport seems pretty decent, except that they use those stupid buses for unloading international arriving flights and they had construction going on outside the airport. We got ripped off on cab fare from the airport. We were going to the marina area -- about a mile away max -- and the airport taxi charged us 150 pesos ($15) for what, in any city taxi, would have cost 25 pesos. Next time I go to Puerto Vallarta I'll try to get in early enough to walk out of the airport onto the main road where I can catch a bus or a city taxi.
Getting around is easy. Taxis are everywhere and are almost always Nissan Sentras. It's 25 pesos for most trips around town, 42 pesos from downtown to the marina area. The smelly crowded city buses are also very convenient and cost just 3 pesos.
Where to Eat:
There are tons of restaurants everywhere, and I never had a bad meal in Puerto Vallarta. My favorites were two restaurants, at opposite ends of the island in Rio Cuale. Oscar's was the name of the one at the river's mouth. I also enjoyed Viejo Vallarta and Tequilas, both downtown on the Malecon, with second story dining rooms looking out over the bay. I also enjoyed a couple places downtown called Chatas and La Paloma. Everything was tasty, and the only real disappointment was the grilled garlic lobster tail I ordered at one place, which was very small and a bit rubbery.
Wrap-Up
I had a blast in Puerto Vallarta! The place is very cool and has a very mexican feel, with traditional architecture, twisty cobblestone streets, and a huge variety of things to do and see. I loved the variety of shops downtown, strolling the park in the Rio Cuale, and hanging out on the beach, toes in the sand and beer in the hand. Life is good in Puerto Vallarta...
Recommended:
Yes
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